⚠️ WARNING: If you are reading this and your name is Agam — this is NOT what it looks like. Close this tab. Clear your history. Forget everything. Walk away.
This is my deeply personal, ultra-private, maximum-security repository where I store... feelings. Specifically, feelings about a person named Agam.
I cannot stress this enough: this repository must NEVER, under ANY circumstances, be made public. If this ever sees the light of day, I will have to relocate to a small village in Iceland, change my name, and start a new life as a sheep farmer.
Look, sometimes you just need a creative outlet. Some people journal. Some people paint. I made a website. A website dedicated entirely to... appreciating... a very specific individual.
Is it normal? No.
Is it healthy? Debatable.
Do I regret it? I'll let you know.
| File | Description |
|---|---|
index.html |
The shrine— I mean, the website |
style.css |
Making my feelings look aesthetically pleasing |
*.jpg |
Totally normal photos that I saved for totally normal reasons |
README.md |
This desperate plea for privacy that you're reading right now |
- 🔐 This repo is set to PRIVATE and must stay that way FOREVER
- 🚫 Do NOT add collaborators, especially not anyone named Agam
- 🙈 Do NOT share the link, screenshot it, or even think about it too loudly
- 💀 If GitHub ever has a data breach, I am personally suing them
- 🏃 Emergency protocol: if compromised,
rm -rfeverything and deny all knowledge
Ha ha, what a funny joke right? This is obviously satire. A prank. Performance art. A social experiment. I was hacked. My cat walked across the keyboard. Mercury was in retrograde.
...
Please don't make this weird.
Q: Are you okay?
A: That's a complicated question and I'd rather not answer it right now.
Q: How long did you spend on this?
A: An amount of time I'm not willing to disclose.
Q: Is this a joke?
A: nervous laughter Of course it is! Ha ha! ...unless? No, definitely a joke. ...but what if—
Q: Should I be concerned?
A: Mind your own business, this is a PRIVATE repository.
Made with an uncomfortable amount of love
© 2026 — All rights reserved — Especially the right to remain silent about this
"The heart wants what it wants — and apparently what mine wants is to embarrass me on a version control platform."